爱の游戏

Love Game

[ Chapter 4 ]

Love means to commit oneself without guarantee,

to give oneself completely in the hope that our love will produce love in the loved person.

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“ Good evening, singapore ! this is DJ phileos on air at FM 14.3, bringing you " love is in the air " ~ cue in ”

The most wonderful of all things in life is the discovery of another human being with whom one's relationship has a growing depth, beauty and joy as the years increase. This inner progressiveness of love between two human beings is a most marvelous thing; it cannot be found by looking for it or by passionately wishing for it. It is a sort of divine accident, and the most wonderful of all things in life.

so has it happened to you ? the serendipity that has existed since the beginning of life ...

hmm .. lets see this week we've a listener by the name of simplerpis sharing with us her views on love .. well just like her name has suggested ~ simple pris ~ her name matches with her views on love, the yearn for that simple love, a romantic yet unconventional love .. she still harbour for that hope in the existence of true love happening, even though its rare just as she has mentioned about a friend of her loving selflessly but was not reciprocated. She thought that her love & sacrifices previosuly were nothing as compared to her friend .. she even stated out a rule ; if you love more, you'll get hurt with the same amount of love you've put in ..

pris .. hmm ..what can i say ~ though its demoralising to see true love slowly drifting away from us, but don't give up hope

Love means to commit oneself without guarantee,

to give oneself completely in the hope that our love will produce love in the loved person.

I'm sure someday you can love in the manner of what your friend has experienced , even though its sad to say that she has suffered a great deal about it, but someday this memory shall become part of her & grow with her as she matures, just like you & me through this journey.

Topic for the week ; love is like a maze

Someone ever tell me that love is like a maze.

Once you are in it, it’s very hard to come out.

When the two of you are in love, you walk through the maze together.

You will encounter difficulties that block your advancement.

You count on each other’s support.

All will be well because loving her means much more to you than anything else.

Then one day, one of you decided that life is probably better to walk alone. The two of you parted ways and seek other hands to hold.

You continue to walk through the paths that were once laid previously by the two of you.

You begin to feel trapped in this maze.

No one is there for you anymore.

I believe most of us would experience once in our lifetime.

A time when we felt all alone deep down in our hearts.

A time when even our closest friends don’t even understands us.

As times goes by, you’ve learned that trusting someone is a serious bet which you must bare the loss if one day the odds are against you. You tried to walk the road once again.

This time, you tried to hold others hands. Making people believe in you and trust you may not seems as easy as you think.

The responsibility of not letting go is much tougher than just holding onto one’s hand.

Finally a hand reached out to hold you in darkness.

You are now holding another person’s hand as you continue venturing the unknown.

Truth is... you’ve never walked out of the maze.

Because once you step into the maze of love, there’s no coming out.

So do you you dare to step into this maze of love ? tee-hee ~ till then you hear me on love is in the air .. have a good evening ~ adiues ~

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" so I've never stepped out of the maze afterall ... " I spoke softly.

Tears slowly weld around my eyes. It has been a long one year since that incident.

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“ Stop treating me like this !!! ” Yuri cried.

“ Shut up, You’ll do as what I say ” A threatening voice was the only reply to Yuri's plead.

" No .. please .. no !! ~ I beg you ... noooo " Yuri continue with her plead.

Yuri was being pushed hard onto the floor as she started to cover herself in tears & blood.

" No .. please don't take away my baby ~ " Yuri pleaded.

The man finally walked away without even glancing at Yuri. She finally fainted in the pool of blood oozing out from her blouse.

The moment when she regained her conciousness, a devastating news was brought upon to her.

" Sorry .. But i couldn't save your child. We had to abort it to save you ~ we'll have to ward you for a few days to monitor you, pls take care "

The doctor spoke in a solemn manner to release the breaking news to Yuri.

" the baby is gone .. there's nothing left between us anymore ... " Yuri started mumbling.

-----------------

It was the toughest period of my life. Having to accept both fact that the one I've loved the most has left me & losing my beloved child to the heaven. A period of time when I felt lonely deep down in my heart, a time when no one, not even my closest friend could understand me. I felt so trapped in the maze. I struggled to find a way out of this maze in total despair, only to find out that I've not move an inch at all. I've just been going around the maze in circles, this seemingly never ending circle just leads me to a path whereby I'll be back to where I've started.

Even though, I've brace up myself, this incident has left a scar within my heart forever.

" phileos ... just who are you ? why are you always digging deep within my heart, just to remind me of my scar again .. why ? " My tears slowly flowed out.

I thought I've passed the test when I've finally muster up my courage to perform on stage once again. But the feelings within me now just made all the previous attempts I've made for the past year futile.

" Is it another test for me again ? God !!! Why are you doing this to me ??? Have I not suffered enough ??? " I shouted out loud.

I was finally exhausted from the crying, as I fell asleep to the tears flowing within my heart.

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* 5 .. 4 .. 3 .. 2 ...... 1 ~ cue in ! welcome to happy sunday ~ HAPPY !!! hooo tonight as usual a exciting programme lined up for you all ~ & of course not forgetting to intro our special guests for tonight, Super Senior, Small Bang, Shiny, Hara, Red Eyed Girl, Yuri & last but not least the prince of ballad Jay !!!

" Hi everyone ~ " the special guests waved & smiled to the camera.

*applause*

" First up ... a special performance by our prince of ballad Jay !!! "

*applause*

I smiled & went to the stage.

" Everyone .. ever heard of the Orion Belt ? " I asked confidently.

The whole floor went in a moment of silence. I started to hear small discussions & whispers among the artise & hosts. Just then some voice shouted a reply,

“ You mean the three stars that sit side by side? It’s one of the more visible stars in the night sky. I suppose it’s meant for navigation purpose. ” Yuri replied confidently from her seat.

“ Yeah… but you know why the three stars are there? ”

" I don't know .. " Yuri looked at me & smiled.

“ Let me tell you a story then. Long Ago in the ancient times of Rome, there lives a very poor farmer by the name of Heron.

He worked night and day over the fields of grains to harvest food for his family. To him life was so miserable that he never thought he would love someone until the day when the boss came to collect his tax with his daughter, Zoenith.

It was a love at first sight, Heron knew she was the one for him.

Heron then tried so hard to impress his beloved.

He told Zoenith that he will climb up the highest mountain in Rome to catch a falling star in return for her love.

Zoenith did like Heron but due to the strong rejection from her father she could only avoid him.

When she knows he was going to the highest mountain she ran away from home to find him. She finally found him on the cliff of the highest mountain.

The Boss sent many men to search for Heron and wanted his head back for reward they look high and low for this young farmer and finally they reached the tip of the highest mountain.

As they approach, Zoenith begins to plead for their mercy to let Heron go but Heron stood still as he holds Zoenith's hand.

He spoke of real sincerity.

“Knowing you was a blessing but for you to be with me by my side is a miracle indeed let this day not be the day as we are parted but for this day tat we are united even if we were to go through hell together”

Heron tighten his grip of Zoenith's hand as they jump down the cliff together.

Venus then the Goddess of Love saw what happened to the wrecked couple. She understands that there was indeed true love between this young couples.

She then sent a shinning star to fetch them and bring them to the evening sky.

Then on in the nights of Rome, people will see 3 stars.. Heron, Zoenith and the middle star between them which symbolize their Love... ”

I then paused for a while. I continued on looking towards the direction of Yuri,

“When either one of the stars stops glowing, the other two will simply die off. This is because their love is not tested by time but will last longer than time.....”

At the exact moment I completed my sentence, a music starts to play in.

It always appeared before me

Your face, I remember

My heart that stopped short

You spitefully took my disfunctional heart

And with your bright smile

That's how you easily opened my heart

It's true, that is how I became your man

All my unpleasant memories, I no longer recall

Because the hand that holds me tight

Is as warm as spring

And now like a dream my heart

Has gradually stopped by your side

Without awakening for a single moment,

I dream an endless dream

And now like breathing,

If you were to always rest by my side

If you were to always remain this way

Nothing better nothing better than you

Nothing better nothing better than you

And now like a dream, My heart

In your embrace, is held still

Without awakening for a single moment,

I dream an endless dream

And now like breathing,

If you were to always rest by my side

If you were to always remain this way

Nothing better nothing better than you

Nothing better nothing better than you

Nothing better nothing better than you

I ended off my love ballad with a punch as everyone started to stand up from their seats clapping their hands shouting ENCORE !!!

" you simply melt everyone's heart .. Jay ... you're indeed worthy of the name Prince of Love ballad .... " the host started to joke.

" haas ~ well ..... *shrugs* " I just gave my brightest smile & use that pair of electrifying eyes to mesmerize the audience.

" It was as if you're singing that song to someone very special to you ~~~~~ so touching & sweet .. hahah ~ so did it by chance happen to be someone here ? " the host jokingly asked.

" Well .. if by any chance you look back at the camera replay, he was looking towards the direction of YURI !!! the other host cut in with his answer before i could reply.

The audience & guests started to tease the both of us, as they readily agreed to what the host has mentioned.

" haas .. well if thats what most of you want as my answer, so be it then .... " I smiled towards the camera & sneak a glance towards Yuri.

Everyone started to be excited over my reply again.

I could see Yuri blushing from all these teasing, that angelic smile she presented seems so different from the her on screen. That innocence & naiveness in her smile made it so much sweeter & really made me have the rush to want to protect her for that moment of time.

------------------

" Now our next performace by Yuri ~~~ !!! " the host said.

" Hi everyone ~ I'm Yuri ... tonight I'm playing the violin, its not considered exceptional if you want to compare me with those orchestra performers, hee but well its still a special show lined up for you all, so stay tuned ... " I ended off with my brightest smile as I adjust my posture & positoning with the violin on hand.

" Everyone .. Por Una Cabeza by Carlos Gardel ... " I took a bow & started to play with the piano music as supporting music.

Towards the middle part, I stopped playing, & immediately danced to the music. It was a tango dance in accordance to the por una cabeza being played.

ENCORE !! ENCORE !! Everyone shouted at the end of my performance.

I took a bow & smiled again.

" A very different Yuri we are seeing tonight for sure .... never did we expect that sexy tango to appear halfway through & being put up by you ... " the host said.

" hee .. i thought i could surprise my fans & you all for once ... well it seems like I've did it successfully ... hehe ... " I replied

" you sure do ..... you've mesmerize me with your dance .... " the host jokingly said & started to do some silly tango actions by himself.

" hey .. stop it ... no matter how good you're with tango .. you're NOTHING BETTER THAN him ... " the other host jokingly said.

" NOTHING BETTER than him ..... oooo ~ nothing better than you ~ nothing better than you ... i get your meaning ... !! haha "

The audience & artise started to laugh as the conversation was indirectly made to tease me & Jay's song earlier on. I just blushed through the conversation as they made fun of me again.

----------------

" well .. we are coming to the end of the show .. as usual we'll always play a game with our special guests ... tonight game is Majority Wins !!! this game is simple ~ we will ask a question to all the artises, & they will choose between yes or no ... so basically the majority who chooses either yes or no won't receive any punishments, whereas the minority will have the dry ice sprayed on them ... wooooo icy cold !!! haha "

All the artises nods in accordance with the rules of the game being explained.

" Lets get started !!! " the host shouted.

" Question No.1 ; you see a blind woman trying to cross the road by herself, will you go foward & approach your help ? choose .... "

Every artises chooses the YES section without hesistation.

" We sure have helpful people with us tonight .. hahaha & i believe that all of us will have done that ... EASY question for the 1st .. now comes the challenging one .. "

" Question no.2 ; Do you think that Super Senior are just a bunch of oldies dancing on stage ... ? hahaha .. chooose ... "

Some chooses Yes & No, & eventually the minority receives the dry ice treatment. As the game goes on, challenging & funny questions were posed with links to the special guests tonight.

" last question for the night ... do you think Jay & Yuri have ignite some love sparks tonight at our show ? wooooo choose ~ !! "

Both Jay & Yuri went into a dilemma which section to choose, as it involves the both of them.

Both of them finally made their decision after some commotion.

" The result is out ! only two chooses YES ... & the rest chooses NO ... wow an interesting poll !! hahaha the two who chooses yes are Jay & Yuri !!!! Gosh ~~ Dry ice !!! hahaha & what an answer from the both of them ... "

The two of them blushed at the remarks made & by their own choices too, never did they expect the rest would have choose no ... as they thought that for sure they'll be trying to tease them again with this question being asked. It was indeed a night filled with fun, surprises & excitment for both Jay & Yuri.

[ To be cont.. ]

爱の游戏

Love Game

[ Chapter 3.5 ]

~ A chapter dedicated to you ~

If I speak in the different languages of men & angels, but not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.

If I have the gift to see the future and comprehend mysteries and have the knowledge of the world, but not love, I am nothing.

If I give all my possession to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not loved, I gain nothing.

so how about you ?

will you choose to know love just to gain that something that has been lingering deep in your heart all this while ?

If you will to possess this special book that tells everything about yourself,

will you do anything to change the past or the future ?

Eventually, you determine the stories written in it ..

how many chapters will it contain ?

what will you write in this chapter ?

i guess

thats for you to find out & for me to know ~

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It was the longest night that Jay has to go through. The countless events that happened in the past few days, one after another linking to this special girl Yuri. He just couldn't seem to catch hold any of them running through, but to just allow them rattle through his exhausted mind.

“Love is you, you have to love yourself before you learn to love others”

Yuri's words has create an riot in Jay's thoughts, that mutiny going against his strong belief of love as an game. He was choked by his own beliefs for once, do he not love himself all this while ? how come he just can't seem to find any answers to what is love afterall ... not even his beliefs could provide him an satisfactory answer.

At the moment of silence, an picture on his desk caught his attention & interrupted his thoughts. It was a picture of his family of four. It was taken when he was very young. The vibrant smile in all four faces, his dad, mum & sister simply potray out the blissfulness & warmth in one's family. No one have expected the terror & tears hidden behind this smile.

His dad has always believed that being the sole breadwinner of the family, his sole responsibility is to provide the family with the best comfort, in terms of basic necessities, yet he overlook the most important one that holds a family, love. He solely believe that giving the best to his family is already fufilling his role as a loving father to his kids & wife. Thus they should never question his credibility as a good role model father, thus he should has his own freedom in certain areas of life which they should never question why, & learn to accept it in the harsh & cruel way. Jay's father owns a mistress, this harsh reality slowly destroyed the trust & warmth in the family. His mum endure through all the suffering just for the sake of the kids, but at a later stage, it kinda turns ugly & became an unacceptable truth for her, making her look frail, hysterical at times, & slowly evolving into a haggard.

Jay came to experience all these terror & turmoil at a young age. From the very beginning, love has already chosen to shun him. He has no choice, as much as he wanted to patch the broken pieces, it only came as a huge impact on him each time he try to resolve it. Slowly, he was engulfed by this harsh truth, & he became numb to it. He was void of all the feelings & warmth in this family. He set himself a goal, to leave this bottomless pit as soon as he got the capability to do so. Thus his rise to stardom gave him an opportunity to dump away his unhappy past for once. Though he hated his life as an artise, somehow it became the one & only way to let him escape from reality, to give him an different identity in front of others, the perfect "Jay" that everyone is looking upon to.

The sound of an imcoming email broke the silence & thoughts. It was a friend request on facebook. This particular person didn't display her real name out in her account, she named herself as pink princess. Jay has no impression who this girl was & decided to view her profile before accepting her. He was bewildered by this friend request, as this account of his is a private account & not known to his fans. It was a low profile account with only a few friends in it. He don't even put his current photos in it, the one & only displayed picture was a 7 year old him where most wouldn't have link the current him to this picture.

This pink princess has uploaded loads of pictures, all potraying scenic pictures except herself in it.

" A photographer ? " Jay thought to himself.

Jay was trying to refresh through his list of photographer friends, but just couldn't seem to match any with this pink princess. Moreover her profile is rather low too, with only a few people in it, & no links to him ...

Jay begun flipping through the pictures, one by one, enjoying the scenic postures taken, & also the meaningful caption that was written below each photo taken.

Then, he chance upon a photo album named " the power of love " .

Inside this album contain pictures of mothers showering her love & care to each of their childrens.

the caption was written ;

All mothers carry a special bond with their children. They can always sense the happiness & sorrows that you carry. Afterall the 10 months spent inside our mum's womb is not for nothing. We pratically ate & drank what she consumed too. However as we grow up to face problems of our own, they can only watch silently from one side, as we start to display a sign board " do not bother me, I've grown up !! " on ourselves. Boys want their ego, Girls want their privacies, this is something that mothers has to live with, they can only pray hard that the problems we faced will eventually be solved.

No matter what wrong we have done to you, please don't blame us, nor hate us .. we want the best for you too as much as you want the best for your future children too ~

faith, hope and love is what we have in you

Jay's eyes was reddened by this. Somehow facing the past of his family & looking through the photo album, he came to realise the meaning behind Yuri's words

“Love is you, you have to love yourself before you learn to love others”

[ To be cont.. ]

faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

爱の游戏

Love Game

[ Chapter 3 ]

If love does not know how to give and take without restrictions, it is not love, but a transaction that never fails to lay stress on a plus and a minus.

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“ Good evening, singapore ! this is DJ phileos on air at FM 14.3, bringing you " love is in the air " ~ cue in ”

Love, love, love !!! we almost hear it everyday , everywhere , it is used so often that we don’t really give it a thought.

The question that needs to be answered is what really is love?

Was love created so that hate can be suppressed?

Is love something that both man and woman hope for when their world comes crashing down on them?

Does love help relief pain and suffering felt by victims of natural disasters?

Aphrodite, Venus, Cupid, and Eros were well know as the gods of love and sex by Greeks and Romans well before Christ was born, which basically makes love a very old subject. Yet this still does not answer the question, what really is love? If you were to flip thru a dictionary, love would mean a strong feeling of affection or strong feeling linked with sexual attraction. But does that really define the meaning of love ?

well .. at least to me .. love is a feeling that can never be defined, you can only experience through it to find your real meaning of love ...

When you talk about love to someone, what usually will be said is , love is pure, love is from the heart, love is special. Is this really true or is it just that we are afraid of being alone without a partner ? That answer can only be found within ourselves to that someone in your heart now. & well it'll lead us to the topic of the night, True Love ... does it really exists ?

The pureness of True Love is one thing that keeps people going, throughout their life. The simplest things that you do for her will get happiness in return. One sad thing about the pureness of True Love is the existence of temptation. Whether is it materialism or lust, people always find themselves stuck in a situation and therefore love died down in time…

As far as I can see, we all yearn for that simple undying love that rumors to exist. Its out there somewhere, clouded by the deceiving facts of life and overshadowed by the logical mindset of humans.

An interesting sharing by one of our listeners mcmq. As much as she wants to believe in the existence of true love, she is held back by the harshness & reality of love.

True love comes straight from the heart not the mind. It can starts off with a simple chat between two strangers, from the first conversation comes the mutual respect. Soon, without realizing it, there’s a feeling of likeness in the air. From likeness, it gradually grows to love. But true love does not end here.

From love, there’s commitment. The feeling stop you from starting any other possible cases of likeness with other people. The same feeling which get you back to the same person whom you have been sharing your life with. Many people never went to the stage of commitment, only to blame themselves later for never experiencing true love. If loving is easy, living your hectic life would be easier.

True love is a gift. Though finding it may be hard, keeping it is harder than anyone can imagine. We struggle through all our life in search of it, yet when we find it, it just disappear. Just like sand sipping your hands, never to return again.

True love means happiness for your partner even if it means sufferings for you. As much as we would want to deny it, we do sacrifice for love. A simple give in during a heated argument can prevent harsh words being used and breaking of hearts. So next time when you think your partner is unreasonable, think again. You could make he/she less annoyed by giving in just this once. You may give in many, many times in your relationship but at least you know its worth the effort when the storm is over.

True love will be tested one day, only then the declaration for one another is truthful. Temptations will always be there, there will always be someone nicer, younger or more beautiful than your current one. Only will that day tell your truthfulness towards your heart and your soul.

True Love exists deep down in our hearts…

Hope someday everyone of you can find it ... for it is still lurking somewhere within your heart, waiting for that moment to be reveal .. this is DJ phileos on FM 14.3, have a good evening with your loved ones, ~ adieus ~

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" tsk tsk .. true love .. what a joke by this phileos ! "

Love to me is just like a game. Eventually it'll result in someone winning or losing it. Until now I've yet to taste that bitterness of defeat, for those that are willing to play this game are not to my match at all. They only end up in sorrow & despair while I'll just soak in the sense of achievement by winning the game.

I does not spare a glance to love,

when people around me sunk into the abyss of love, boasting to me about their stories, I was unaffected.

I adhere to my free and unrestrained principle, & even ridiculed them for their so called love, & scoffed at them when they are suffering from love.

" End of day, those women are just afraid of being alone .. they just need someone to fill up their sense of emptiness .. tsk & we men are the victims .. how stupid is that .. isn't it .. stanley ? tsk ... " I spoke in a bitter tone.

" yes .. you're right ~ Jay !! always right ~ those women just deserved it when they lose that " game " to you .. hehe ... " Stanley reply in a careful manner.

" tsk ... by the way whats the schedule today ? "

" Eh .. let me see ... a talk show programme , then a meeting with director with regards to your album promotion ... thats about it .. "

I gave a sigh, before acknowledging to stanley's words.

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If you weren’t existed in this world, how would the lives of the people around you be?

Will they be happier?

Will they be sadder?

Will this world still be the same?

All of us asked ourselves this question at least once in our lifetime. Some were asked upon by others.

What is the meaning of existence?

Why were you created to suffer at the point of birth?

Some people are born rich while others struggled to survive through a day’s meal.

Some people are born smart while others struggled to get themselves through college.

You looked at those who are financially stronger than yourself.

You envy their abilities to get what they want.

Then you would ask yourself

“Why were you born?”

Be it a mistake, a moment of extended pleasure or even planned for by your parents.

Your very existence means a lot to the people around you.

You give your parents someone to scold when you don’t well for your grades.

You give your classmates your notes to copy or normally it would be vice versa.

You give your friends moments of laughter when all of you get together.

You give your first love to your crush.

You give your first girlfriend your first kiss.

You give your parents their first allowance.

You give your wife her first wedding ring.

You give your child their first breath of life.

Then you looked back at all the memories that you’ve gain and all the others that people remember you for.

Isn’t it wonderful that because you are existed to experience the meaning of life?

“Love is you, you have to love yourself before you learn to love others”

this is Yuri, starring as the guest DJ for the night. Hope you all enjoy my session on air, & till then ... byes ~~~ !!

" Good job ~ Yuri .. can consider letting you be DJ too .. heh .. " Gina gave a pat on my shoulder.

" haas ~ thanks .. truthfully speaking I'm looking foward to be one if the company has such plans for me .. maybe letting me feature on a programme similar to the one DJ phileos is hosting .. hehe "

" hahaha ~ well .. I can consider that & provided if any of the radio station willing to give you that chance .. hehe ... come lets hurry for the next schedule !! " Gina spoke in hastily tone.

" yes ! boss !!! " I teased gina as I fasten my pace to the car with her for the next planned schedule.

--------------------

*applause*

" welcome to Pahim's talk show ... tonight we've a very speical guest with us .. the hottest singer in town at the moment, the prince of love ballad that took the industry by storm with his love songs ... everyone lets welcome Jay ! ~ ! hohoho ~ "

*applause*

" thank you everyone ~ " I waved & smiled my way to the stage.

" honoured to have you here today with us .. " love phobia " topping on the chart for 14 consecutive weeks, & now your " love game " is en route to creating another music record on the charts, you've surely taken the music industry by storm .. Jay ~ so whats the key to all this records you're creating .. hohoho ~ "

" firstly .. I'll have to say all this records & achievements were created by my beloved fans out there .. if not for their support, I won't be able to bring my music to this level of achievement .. of course not forgetting my entertainment company for giving me this chance too ... hee "

" yes indeed .. is not an easy feat to have reach this stage .. especially for a newcomer ~ so how're you taking it ? with all the limelight shone you ? I'm sure is a very different experience before you turn famous .. hoho "

" yes .. definitely ~ a major change over in my life ... in fact I'm still adapting to it ... "

" ar .. the irony behind all this ... though you claim you're adapting .. it seems you've find yourself comfortable in where you're today ... look at all the scandals with these female artises .. hoho ~ you sure are creating a record in those headlines too .. hoho "

" hee .. like you've mentioned its scandals .. no truth in it ... these female artises just happen to be working partners, & well the magazines just decide to make it a big news .. shrugs* thats where they are coming from ... i guess is something I've to learn in this industry too .. isn't it "

" hmm .. yes definitely .. so since you're so well versed in love ballads, earning you the nickname " the prince of love ballad ", I presume you must have some experience with love that enable you to bring out the essence in those love ballads .. "

" haha ~ well shrugs* perhaps ... "

" aww .. so secretive ... hohoho so do you know love ? as in what is love to you ? "

At that moment of time, I just stared at the camera screen with blankness.

" do i know love "

those were the words that I've always been asking with the girls that I've dated. They've never been able to give me an satisfactory answer. They don’t know about love as they probably only want companionship, they want attention and someone to pamper them.

As i continued to look at the screen, i realised that i was not able to answer the question outright too.

" hmmm ... " I stuttered at the question.

" judging from the sad tone in your love ballads .. love must have hurt you alot .. hohoho "

" haha I've no reply to your answer .. since I've never really experience true love before .. shrugs* "

At the end of the whole show, i didn't really vent my fustrations on the host or stanley for those remarks & questions that were asked. I guess the host just ignite some spark in me that set me thinking what is all about love ? To think I often asked others about what is love & yet I've no answer to this question too. I just sat at the car, & shut my eyes, reflecting on this question that hasn't puzzled me all this while until today. All the previous thoughts about love as an game just halt for that moment of time, i start to question myself is that really love ?

Just then, an voice from the radio interrupted my thoughts.

Your very existence means a lot to the people around you.

You give your parents someone to scold when you don’t well for your grades.

You give your classmates your notes to copy or normally it would be vice versa.

You give your friends moments of laughter when all of you get together.

You give your first love to your crush.

You give your first girlfriend your first kiss.

You give your parents their first allowance.

You give your wife her first wedding ring.

You give your child their first breath of life.

Then you looked back at all the memories that you’ve gain and all the others that people remember you for.

Isn’t it wonderful that because you are existed to experience the meaning of life?

“Love is you, you have to love yourself before you learn to love others”

this is Yuri, starring as the guest DJ for the night. Hope you all enjoy my session on air, & till then ... byes ~~~ !!

“Love is you, you have to love yourself before you learn to love others”

I paused for that moment when i heard that.

[ To be cont.. ]